Who's Weird?

I go to Library Babies (I'm not sure that's what it's really called, but that's what I call it) every week with the Princess. We both love going. Two librarians switch off, every other week. One is pretty good. And the other is AWESOME! We sing songs, do finger plays, read books, and watch the librarians with puppets. I really think the Princess likes watching the other kids. And I like talking to the other moms.

The first week we went (about a month ago), I sat down beside a nice looking lady and her baby girl. I figured the baby was closest to the Princess in age, most of the other kids were toddlers. The mom and I exchanged casual hellos and went on to sing and play with our babies. Then the mom got up to change her baby's diaper. And she pulled out of her diaper bag...CLOTH DIAPERS!! I was shocked. Even though I have a few new friends who cloth diaper, I have never seen anyone out and about who uses cloth. I got really excited and started talking to this mom about it.

Then two weeks later, I walked into the conference room at the library with the Princess in a sling, like usual. A lady playing with her toddler daughter looked up at me and said rather shocked, you're wearing your baby! It was kind of a question, but mostly a shocked statement. She went on to say that she had never seen anyone else wearing their baby out and about. I commented that I had not either. I get stopped a lot and asked about it, but I never see anyone else wearing a baby. This lady and I ended up talking about being AP parents and babywearing. It was fun to see someone in my community having similar parenting styles that I have.

I tell you these library stories to share another story that happened at the Pediatrician's office. Now, this is not a place that I enjoy going. These people are supposed to know what they are talking about, and every time I go there, I have to remind myself that they see the Princess for 15 minutes every couple of months. I am the Princess's momma, and I live with her. While they know a lot medically, they may not be the best people to tell me how to raise my baby.

At our last visit, I was led into the office and told to undress the Princess to her diaper. I knew they were going to weigh her, so I checked to see if her diaper was wet. It was, so I proceeded to change her. I had a wipe out, and was getting ready to spray it, when the nurse walked in. She looked at me quizzically and said, that's different! Very sarcastically.

Well I don't have to tell you that I am getting very annoyed with being called weird and looked at like I have a third eye because of my parenting choices. So I decided to turn the tables. I looked at her like she had a third eye and said (a bit too sarcastically, I realized later), it's a cloth diaper! It wasn't really all that bad, what I said. It was just my tone. I said cloth diaper like other people say weird to me. Like they are the ones who are weird for not knowing what a cloth diaper is or not using them (I honestly do not think people are weird for not using cloth. I realize it is a commitment that some people are not willing to make).

At LLL last month, another mom was talking about this very thing. She was saying how "normal" has changed for her family. They used to think that breastfeeding into toddler-hood was weird, and co-sleeping was weird, and baby-wearing was weird, and cloth diapering was weird. And now all of that is normal for them. If they see someone formula feeding or talk to someone who doesn't co-sleep, they think those people are weird.

The King and I had a long discussion about this over the course of about three days. We need to stop thinking of things as normal and weird. We need to accept that people are different. We choose different parenting styles because we are different. And we need to quit judging others because they don't do things the same way that we do. Our definition of "normal" needs to change. We are all normal. And we are all weird. And we are all different. And we are all doing the best we can at a job that is, quite possibly, the hardest one we have ever been given.